Monthly Archives: April 2012

Entry 123: Trendsetters

In all my years on this great planet of ours, my name has rarely been mentioned in the same sentence as the word “trendsetter,” unless it was in a construction such as, “Oh, that Mark, he certainly is not a … Continue reading

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Entry 122: Purdonium For Sale*

So we need one more piece of furniture, something for the dining room to hold liquor and glasses and table linens and such.  You know, a sideboard. Or a buffet. Or a server.  Or a credenza. One of those. I … Continue reading

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Entry 121: Let a Smile Be My Umbrella (Because It Would Be Much Easier), Part II

Previously on The Upsizers… …our hapless heroes were standing on their deck watching water leak from the large plastic umbrella base they had just spent 20 minutes filling while a patio umbrella lay at their feet unassembled because the large … Continue reading

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Entry 120: Let a Smile Be My Umbrella (Because It Would Be Much Easier), Part I

When we first bought this house, we thought it might be nice to use part of the deck to build one of those elaborate, four-season sun rooms. For the winter, it would have a heater and insulated glass windows which … Continue reading

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Entry 119: Taking Sides

I’m a sensitive guy. I cried during Field of Dreams. Not just at the end, but through the whole movie. All 500 times I’ve watched it. Now I even cry in anticipation of scenes I know are coming. I also … Continue reading

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Entry 118: What Your Walls Say About You

Thomas Kinkade, who was to art what James Patterson is to literature, died last week, thus invalidating his claim of being America’s most collected living artist. According to the Huffington Post, his prints are in the homes of an estimated … Continue reading

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Entry 117: The Four Questions (But Not Those Four Questions)

Tomorrow the family is coming up to Connecticut to celebrate Passover. This is my wife’s side of the family, and they do things a little differently by, for instance, having a traditional Passover barbecue. (Trust me, you haven’t lived until … Continue reading

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